http://mondomagazine.net We're not geeks! Fri, 30 Jul 2010 20:51:42 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.1 en hourly 1 http://mondomagazine.net/2008/everyday-existentialism-achieving-immortality-in-a-finite-world-part-two/ http://mondomagazine.net/2008/everyday-existentialism-achieving-immortality-in-a-finite-world-part-two/#comments Fri, 15 Aug 2008 04:00:51 +0000 lifestyle http://mondomagazine.net/?p=1859 Positing on positivity! Get it? You'll laugh later. By Heather Loney [Read part one of this article here] Thinking positively, for a surly naysayer like myself, can be exhausting. In fact, just writing that sentence — having to explain it — feels like a tepid wave of lethargy washing over me. Fortunately for this article, my parents just dropped off a novelty can of "Canadian Beaver Buzz," and before you think my parents are inappropriate and pervy (gutter-minds, all of you!), realize that CBB is Canada's rebuttal to the Red Bull epidemic. With that in mind, allow me to recount. Part one of this topic — how to be remembered after your death — featured some useful, albeit negative, ideas for achieving this feat. Part two vows to be positive! Nothing like a little sunshine in your day, right? The Beav is kicking in, so here we go! Positivity! For the next three paragraphs! [...]]]> http://mondomagazine.net/2008/everyday-existentialism-achieving-immortality-in-a-finite-world-part-two/feed/ 0 http://mondomagazine.net/2008/everyday-existentialism-achieving-immortality-in-a-finite-world-part-one/ http://mondomagazine.net/2008/everyday-existentialism-achieving-immortality-in-a-finite-world-part-one/#comments Fri, 25 Jul 2008 04:00:25 +0000 lifestyle http://mondomagazine.net/?p=1444 Some people achieve everlasting stupidity, others have everlasting stupidity thrust upon them! By Heather Loney Many people grapple with the theory that there is no afterlife, that human life is finite, and that you don't live on after you kick it. One thing they struggle with is creating a sense of immortality for themselves. Lots of folks go the good old ‘offspring/mantelpiece' route: have kids, raise them to have their own kids, and then take a photo of yourself to be placed on the mantelpieces of succeeding generations, so young children can ask, "Who is that?" Our life fulfillment is reached when someone responds "Oh, that is great grandma Heather. She lived x number of years, worked as a _____, and died alone." My opinion of this option? Boooorrrr-ing. Oooh, how creative we are with our procreation. Why not try doing something that we haven't been biologically designed to do? Jeez. [...]]]> http://mondomagazine.net/2008/everyday-existentialism-achieving-immortality-in-a-finite-world-part-one/feed/ 2 http://mondomagazine.net/2008/everyday-existentialism-cowards-cruisers-and-coffee-shops/ http://mondomagazine.net/2008/everyday-existentialism-cowards-cruisers-and-coffee-shops/#comments Fri, 27 Jun 2008 04:00:10 +0000 lifestyle http://mondomagazine.net/?p=1246 During a particularly grueling soccer match last night, my coach was giving our team a half-time inspirational talk, mainly reiterating that we needed to put physical pressure on our much larger opponents, that we needed to be strong and not cower away from them. This talk of course made me think of what every soccer player thinks about during a half-time inspirational talk -- French Existentialism. [...]]]> http://mondomagazine.net/2008/everyday-existentialism-cowards-cruisers-and-coffee-shops/feed/ 7 http://mondomagazine.net/2008/everyday-existentialism-nothingness-and-the-magic-bullet/ http://mondomagazine.net/2008/everyday-existentialism-nothingness-and-the-magic-bullet/#comments Tue, 27 May 2008 04:00:38 +0000 lifestyle http://mondomagazine.net/?p=1143 Seinfeld watched equals thirty minutes closer to the end, la fin, the Big Nothing. So, with this thought in mind, I did a little research in order to maximize my time while I still have it. And where better to look for practical solutions in ingenuity and efficiency than late-night cable television? Remarkably, I did not have to search long, because promptly on channel 6 at 4:02am appeared my savior —The Magic Bullet. According to this eye-opening program, I have been wasting my life like a sap by chopping tomatoes and onions with a knife! When I could have been preparing tasty snacks for all my friends in only 15 seconds! Delicious iced beverages in 20 seconds! A Thanksgiving roast in only 30 seconds! Huzzah! By the end of the program, I vowed to never again make anything that takes longer than 30 seconds to prepare, heat, and serve. Anything more, and I'd be a sucker [...] ]]> http://mondomagazine.net/2008/everyday-existentialism-nothingness-and-the-magic-bullet/feed/ 0 http://mondomagazine.net/2008/everyday-existentialism-things-to-do-before-i-die/ http://mondomagazine.net/2008/everyday-existentialism-things-to-do-before-i-die/#comments Tue, 13 May 2008 05:00:00 +0000 lifestyle http://mondomagazine.net/?p=1049 Heather Loney applies an everyday sensibility to existential crises By Heather Loney I'm not one for New Year's resolutions — promises you make to yourself under the widely accepted pretense that it is perfectly forgivable to either break those promises as soon as January has expired, or dismiss them altogether before your hangover has subsided. I am, however, a fan of lists. Making lists — specifically to-do lists — each item in order of importance, with a little penned box next to it that urges you to place that checkmark, and sigh triumphantly over your latest accomplishment (buy dish soap — check — and order has been restored). With so many choices in the day, the week, a lifetime, I often wonder how it is possible that people without lists manage to dress themselves and pay their phone bill in the same day [...]]]> http://mondomagazine.net/2008/everyday-existentialism-things-to-do-before-i-die/feed/ 2