This week New Warriors and Grimm Fairy Tales.
By Miles Baker and Owen K. Craig
Each week we use random.org’s random integer generator to create two random numbers. They then count down on the release list until they find out their RANDOM COMIC OF THE WEEK! No matter what the publisher, what the issue, what the arc, we will be there reviewing things with little or no context.
Miles’ Book
New Warriors #5
Written by Kevin Grevioux
Penciled by Paco Medina
Inked by Juan Vlasco
Marvel Comics, 2007
Dude! At the end of this book the New Warriors are totally going to break up. I know, man. I couldn’t believe it either. I mean, if this group of completely unknown heroes with an unclear agenda can’t make it, what does that say about the rest of us?
Seriously, why are the heroes shocked that their leader is pulling the plug on a team that saw a teammate killed in their first mission? That exact situation happens in every goddamned team book since the X-Men reformed in the 70s. At this point it’s like finishing a mediocre date and then saying that you don’t want to see each other again. It’s not the best, but it’s no reason to open your mouth in shock. This shock ending lands really soft. Your team is breaking up after 5 issues? I really don’t care, man.
I know drawing is hard, I’m not very good at it all, but is it so hard for a paid professional to draw teenagers and adults a little different in a team book? I mean, if the writer is going to make a big deal about it, maybe the teen heroes should look a little less up to the task when they stand next to Iron Man.
So, yes, I didn’t like a single thing about this book. Even with the recap page it’s unclear why anything is happening and with so many characters a roster would have been really useful. The issue is clearly meant to be read in a trade because side stories are included with no introductions (is that J. Jonah Jameson on a news beat — because it looks like him, but what the hell is he doing there) and who the villains are and what they want is never explained. As a serial, this book just ain’t cutting it.
Also, Marvel, stay the fuck away from Jessica Jones unless you are going to make her awesome. People who have read Alias know what I’m talking about.
Owen’s Book
Grimm Fairy Tales #17
Written by Ralph Tedesco and Joe Tyler
Penciled by Scott Woodward
Inked by Andrew Mangum
Zenescope Comics, 2007
All week I’ve been referring to Grimm Fairy Tales #17 as my “slutty book of the week” rather than my “random book of the week”. One look at the cover and it’s easy to see why.. Seriously, there is no reason to feature that girl dressed like that, especially given that the content does not reflect the image. At the very least, it makes many of the superhero comics out there seem less sexist by comparison.
This is my first issue of Zenescope Comics’ Grimm Fairy Tales, but if this issue is any indication the series is a convoluted mess. They seem to be trying to emulate Tales From The Crypt with their almost-morals and their slightly-twisted-endings. There wasn’t a lot to like here, though. The twist at the end undermines the original fairy tale’s point, the characters seem shallow and the art…good lord, the art.
Penciler Scott Woodward seems to have all the grasp of human anatomy of infamous 90s penciller Rob Liefeld at his worst, and inker Andrew Mangum seems so determined to make the lines as clean and clear as possible that it only highlights the bizarre shapes of the characters’ bodies. And I won’t even mention the page where one character has the wrong hair colour! For those following along at home, and I hope you’re not, it’s in the scene where the mother is just finished reading the book — wasn’t she supposed to be a redhead?
So yeah, I didn’t like it.
